Heaven is Where: The Police are British, The Chefs are Italian, The Mechanics are German, The Lovers are French and It’s all organized by the Swiss.
Hell is Where: The Police are German, The Chefs are British, The Mechanics are French, The Lovers are Swiss and It’s all organized by the Italians.
I think this is absolutely hilarious!! (Does that make me racist? )
Well, it isn’t exactly February 2nd, now is it? But maybe this little guy didn’t know it either! Just after the Iowa Hawkeye Football game today, he was checking around the back yard looking for something to eat. He is a nice looking little fella, though! What do you think?
I got this email a while ago, but it’s worth repeating now. Thanks, Judy!
A few weeks ago I was talking with an out of state friend. While we chatted, I kept talking about the upcoming Iowa game. He is not a big sports fan, and had never been to an Iowa Football game. He just could not understand my passion for Iowa Hawkeye Football. “What is the big deal about Iowa football? That is all I hear people talking about up here,” he asked.
- Iowa Hawkeye Football is best described as a crisp fall day with 70,000+ people chanting I .. O .. W ..A.
- Hawkeye Football is seeing a 9 month old at the game dressed in black and gold and thinking “If I had only been so lucky…”.
- Hawkeye Football is the 60 year old from Sioux City who drives 6 hours every Saturday to park his RV in somebody’s yard and tailgate all day until the game.
- Hawkeye Football is wearing a black and gold shirt in Denver, CO and having somebody stick their head out of a car at a stoplight and scream “GO HAWKS!”
- Hawkeye Football is knowing at the tender age of 5 that the Cyclones are vicious evildoers to be hated, but having no idea why.
- Hawkeye Football is a guy like Dallas Clark, who walks onto the team, 3 years later is a star, leaves a year early to play in the NFL, but was SO DAMN NICE that nobody can begrudge him for it.
- Hawkeye Football is a guy like Shonn Greene, who came in with a scholarship but lost it due to bad grades, worked hard in the classroom so as not to let his teammates down and ended up leading the Big 10 in rushing, and never ONCE forgot to credit his teammates in helping him.
- Hawkeye Football is having one of your starting offensive lineman graduate to go to med school!
- Hawkeye Football is naming your firstborn son Hayden.
- Hawkeye Football is the little black and gold flags waving off of every car antenna caravanning up and down I-80 and I-380 every Saturday on their way to Iowa City.
- Hawkeye Football is the bricks of Kinnick and the grass on the field with the smell in the air of some kind of meat barbecuing that will soon be put on a stick and sold to a tanked undergrad who can no longer speak as they are hoarse from screaming from the front row of the student section.
- Hawkeye Football is 12 weeks of getting up at 6 a.m. on Saturday mornings, drinking Bloody Marys and eating a bowl of chili on Melrose before the sun comes up.
- Hawkeye Football is being anywhere in Iowa City on a Saturday afternoon and hearing a dull roar come through the air and thinking, “Hmmm, we must’ve scored”.
- Hawkeye Football is not being able to get up and make it to your 8:00 class Monday through Friday, but managing to be in your favorite Iowa City parking lot with a cold beer in hand before 6:00 on Saturday.
- Hawkeye Football is sitting in Kinnick with your out of state friend and have him turn to you and scream through the roar of the crowd, “I’ve never seen anything like this before … it’s amazing.”
No, it’s Iowa Hawkeye Football.
I got this as a forward, and it really rings with truth. (Thanks, Jim!)
As I watched the news coverage of the massive flooding in the Midwest with over 100 blocks of the city of Cedar Rapids, Iowa, under water with the levees breaking, and the attention now turned downstream for when this massive amount of water hits the Mississippi, what amazed me is not what we saw, but what we didn’t see…
- We don’t see looting.
- We don’t see street violence.
- We don’t see people sitting on their rooftops waiting for the government to come and save them.
- We don’t see people waiting on the government to do anything.
- We don’t see Hollywood organizing benefits to raise money for people to rebuild.
- We don’t see people blaming President Bush.
- We don’t see people ignoring evacuation orders.
- We don’t see people blaming a government conspiracy to blow up the levees as the reason some have not held.
- We don’t see the US Senators or the Governor of Iowa crying on TV.
- We don’t see the Mayors of any of these cities complaining about the lack of state or federal response.
- We don’t see or hear reports of the police going around confiscating personal firearms so only the criminal will be armed.
- We don’t see gangs of people going around and randomly shooting at the rescue workers.
- You don’t see some leaders in this country blaming the bad behavior of the Iowa flood victims on ‘society’ (of course there are no wide spread reports of lawlessness to require excuses).
Iowa vs. Louisiana
- Where are all of the Hollywood celebrities holding telethons asking for help in restoring Iowa and helping the folks affected by the floods?
- Where is all the media asking the tough questions about why the federal government hasn’t solved the problem?
- Asking where the FEMA trucks (and trailers) are?
- Why isn’t the Federal Government relocating Iowa people to free hotels in Chicago?
- When will Spike Lee say that the Federal Government blew up the levees that failed in Des Moines?
- Where are Sean Penn and the Dixie Chicks?
- Where are all the looters stealing high-end tennis shoes and big screen television sets?
- When will we hear Governor Chet Culver say that he wants to rebuild a ‘vanilla’ Iowa, because that’s the way God wants it?
- Where is the hysterical 24/7 media coverage complete with reports of cannibalism?
- Where are the people declaring that George Bush hates white, rural people?
- How come in 2 weeks, you will never hear about the Iowa flooding ever again?